There Is Good In Every Situation

What value have you been placing on negative thoughts? What great thing has ever been accomplished by someone who believed it couldn't be done? How much mental energy do you waste on anger, resentment, or envy? What value will these thoughts ever add to your own life or the life of another? 



We are creatures of emotion. Learning to control our emotions is a life-long practice. Negative thoughts will always come to mind. When we choose to allow those negative thoughts to remain in our minds, and to influence our words and actions, we selfishly turn our focus toward ourselves instead of toward the betterment of others. 

What is gained by letting someone or something get you down? Is the satisfaction of harboring dark emotions worth the happiness and meaning that it robs from your life? 

We cannot control what life brings our way, but we can control how we respond. We can always control our actions and attitude. Negatives will always be easy to find, but doing so will accomplish nothing. There is good in every situation. Many times it takes looking hard in order to find it, but it can always be found. 

When we give up our negativity and our desire to control more than our own attitudes and actions, we will find fulfillment and meaning. We will become acquainted once again with our better selves.

What You Are Someday Going To Be, You Are Now Becoming

One of the most sobering thoughts I have been confronted with is, "What you are someday going to be, you are now becoming." You are now, this moment, exactly what you have been in the process of becoming all your life.

Are you now the person you dreamed about becoming? If you had written down several years ago exactly the type of person you wanted to be today, what kind of person would you have described? How close are you to being that person now?

What kind of person do you want to be a year from now? Or two years from now? Or five years from now? 10? 20? Right now you are in the process of becoming the person you will be a year, or two, or five, or 10 or 20 years from now. 

The habits you have now will determine the kind of person you will become unless you change those habits now.

What attitude would you like to have someday? The attitude you have now is a good indication of the attitude you will have someday, unless right now you begin to develop a new kind of attitude.

If you are not currently doing the things you need to do to become what you want to become, what makes you believe that you ever will?

Do you have situations or circumstances that are preventing you from becoming what you want to become? Those situations and circumstances will pass but they will be replaced by new ones. If you want to become a better (or different) kind of person, you have to get started now. You cannot wait for situations or circumstances that are just right. 

Have you ever told yourself, "Someday I am going to begin to save money on a regular basis?" Are you saving now? If not, you probably never will... unless you begin now. It will never be any easier, even if your income doubles or triples. It will never be any easier, even if you someday earn ten times as much as you do now. Saving money regularly has very little to do with income; it's a decision that is made. If you want to develop a good savings account, begin now. In all probability, it's now or never.

Do you plan to have good work habits someday? Do you have good work habits now? If not, you probably never will... unless you are willing to develop them right now. What you are someday going to be, you are now becoming.

Maybe you have said, "Someday, I am going to set aside time to read the Bible and pray daily." Why someday? If you're not willing to set aside time now, you probably won't do it someday. If you plan to ever begin, you had better start forming the habits today.

Many years ago a man named Spencer Hays asked me, "Jim, what kind of person do you want to be in five years? What kind of husband do you want to be? What kind of father do you want to be?" I answered Spencer by telling him the kind of person I wanted to become; the person I wanted to be as a husband and father. Spencer answered by saying, "What you are someday going to be, you are now becoming." Then he asked me, "If you are not willing to do those things now, what makes you think you ever will?" I resolved then to begin doing those things which would enable me to become the person, the husband and father I wanted to become.

We are each faced with a choice. We can either begin to do those things that will enable us to become what we someday want to become... or we can learn to live with regret. I would prefer to do even those very difficult tasks that will enable me to become what I want to become than to live with regret. Every time you do something you know you ought to do, you feel good about yourself. When you choose not to, you feel bad about yourself. Either way, you are in the process of becoming closer to what you will someday be.

Albert Gray said, "The secret of success of every man who has ever been successful lies in the fact that he formed the habit of doing things that failures don't like to do." To become what we want to become requires forming the habit of doing the right things, the hard things, the things failures don't like to do. The best time to begin forming those habits is right now.

We are now, deliberately and consciously, choosing to become what we want to someday be, or we are unconsciously making the choice. Either way we are in the process. King David in the Old Testament deliberately sought God's will in most facets of his life and became a successful king. He apparently did not consciously decide what kind of father he would become.

As a result, his children were the cause of much personal sorrow. One of his sons gathered an army to overthrow him. Another son raped his own sister. The son who committed the rape was murdered by another of David's sons. We are each in the process, now, of becoming who we will someday be. 

I've had the privilege of hearing many outstanding success stories. The achievers of those successes invariably stated, "I decided to." Immediately after deciding, they took actions that enabled them to begin achieving that which they decided to do. It is through action that we become.

This world is littered with failures. These people did not intend to become what they are. They intended to achieve great things. They intended to become much more than average, but they instead waited around for a better set of circumstances.

What are you waiting for? Students wait until they finish school. Adults wait until they get promoted. Middle-aged people wait until they can retire. Too many people wait for circumstances to be "normal." In the process of waiting, they become who they are, even if it isn't who they intended to become. Life doesn't wait. You're right now, becoming what you are someday going to be. What are you doing right now to become what you want to someday become?

Losers don't intend to lose. They lose while waiting for their circumstances to improve. Winners don't wait. They do what it takes to become what they want to become. They make the hard decisions, and they act on it now. 

You'll find in our world that success begins with a person's will; with their state of mind.

-Jim McEachern (1935 - 2011)

Former CEO of Tom James Company

Emulate, Not Replicate

one of the best pieces of advice i’ve ever received was given by a sales manager back in my book-selling days with southwestern advantage. i was at one of our sales conferences, and we’d been listening to session after session of all of the most successful salespeople, dishing their scoop on their techniques and strategies, and how they became so successful at it. i was feeling slightly overwhelmed by all of the advice and pulled my manager aside to ask for a bit of guidance on how to figure out exactly how i should best apply all of this new advice to follow. i wanted to improve my schedule, my presentations, my referrals, my this, my that. everything! i wanted to be just like these super-successful people!

and he said, “haley, slow down. try to emulate, not replicate. start first by picking an attitude and an action you could best apply to your life and your situation today. 

trust that these people are indeed telling you the methods and the strategies that worked for them. but every one of these things are not necessarily going to be what works for you. listen, and write, and ask questions, and read, and watch, and learn. but at the end of the day, evaluate which of these things are in line with who you are, and what you are trying to accomplish here. is there a tool they used, a choice they made, an attitude they carried, a strategy they adopted that will best help you go from where you're at now to where you would like to be? it's more effective and realistic to emulate a specific idea or action in your own life than it is to replicate everything about someone else."

ding! it finally made sense to me. this was why i had gotten so frustrated so many times before.

so, that being said, how often do we overwhelm ourselves by trying to do everything that everyone else is doing because it works for them. how much more effective would we be if we instead picked an attitude and a single action to emulate that would improve our situation? this goes for anything we are striving to improve at. there are - literally - hundreds of thousands of seminars and books and ‘experts’ and webinars and blogs and articles… that tell us how to [be successful]. and nearly all of those are trustworthy and worth reading.
however, the critical element then, is that we look to ourselves to figure out what it is that we can emulate specifically for our individual situations. besides, it's our uniqueness, not replication, that makes our skills and personalities distinguishable, authentic, and valuable after all.

so whether you’re learning to sell, or to consult, or to teach, or write, or run a business, or lead, or speak, or parent, or cook, or build proposals, or decorate, or negotiate, or camp... try to emulate, not replicate.

@haleyjoprice
Lexi from SkWids.com

Embrace The Challenge

value (val-yoo)

noun

1. a fair or proper equivalent in money, commodities, etc, for something sold or exchanged, for a fair price in return

2. worth, or degree of worth

3. that which is desirable or worthy of esteem for its own sake; thing or quality having intrinsic worth

value, by definition, requires sacrifice. you give me money. i give you milk. you wouldn’t buy the milk if you didn’t think you would derive at least the same value in drinking the milk that you are paying me for it.

and so it is with our work. and our lives, for that matter. the things worth having (or achieving) are not the easy things to achieve. that’s why they’re worth achieving in the first place. they must be sought after. they must be earned. you’ve got to be willing to give something of yourself in order to get them. life doesn’t go around just giving away success to people who are not working for it. you’ve got to shell out whatever it is that you consider to be of equal exchange for that success.

you are certain that your end result is going to be SO good – you’re willing to jump 10-foot hurdles and face down giants to get there. and why wouldn’t you? half the fun and all of the growth is found in facing the challenge!

so whether you’re working toward that mba, or building a collection of self-made jewelry, or seeking that promotion, or building a business, or a team, or a relationship … sure, you will endure hardships and obstacles, but you will feel much more fulfilled once you get there because of those very hardships you braved along the way. try not to feel resentful that it’s taking lots and lots of hard work. but rather, feel excited that you’re working toward something so great, that it’s worth shoveling through lots and lots of…. you know what.

so, ask yourself – what's it worth to you?

@haleyjoprice

Lexi from SkWids.com